A GOOD, GOOD FATHER
A GOOD, GOOD FATHER
God is a good Father.
A very good father.
As I write this I cannot help but be thankful for the opportunity to know Him in such a way, and to be on this journey- learning about His Fatherhood every day.
I was having a conversation with my husband a few days ago about the importance of fathers not only to growing boys but also to growing girls. It was an interesting conversation and as I gazed at Him as he attempted to truly understand what I was trying to communicate, I realised that perhaps he may not be able to fully comprehend this until he becomes a father himself.
Fathers’ hold an incredibly special place in a girl/woman’s heart.
Their presence provides such a strength that covers every aspect of our lives, and so when they are absent, for whatever reason, we really do feel it- immensely. There is a gaping big hole. There is an inextricable bond between earthly fathers and their daughters. Something incredibly deep that can only be described as a divine construction intended for us to catch a glimpse of the relationship between us as believers and our heavenly Father.
Studies have shown that fathers do play a great role in our developmental stages- from girls to women. Father’s who demonstrate affection, support and interest in their children contribute greatly to the cognitive, language, social development, and academic achievement of their children, as well as helping their children to build a strong inner core resource, sense of well-being, good self-esteem, and authenticity.
Our primary relationship with our fathers affect the relationships that we go on to develop in the later years of our lives. Early patterns of interaction with fathers help us to develop ideas of who we are, how we ought to relate to others, and what we consider to be acceptable to us.
When I think of fathers, I think of the patriarch, the guiding light, progenitor and source who plays a central role in a young girls’ emotional well-being. What comes to mind is a strong figurehead who is a more than capable caretaker and disciplinarian, whilst boldly and unashamedly demonstrating sensitivity, strength, and love.
I am often told that I am too much of an optimist, and I don’t “live in the real world”, meaning that in reality, the real issues and effect of sin mean that not many fathers are actually able to live up to the call and responsibility that God has gifted them with. For many men, fatherhood may be an incredibly overwhelming responsibility and they may be unprepared to exercise good stewardship over the position they have been given.
I have found that even with their imperfections, there is still a longing within us women for the covering, protection and attention of a father. We also may not particularly like to share their affection with others and may have the feeling of abandonment and sadness when this occurs.
Many of us may be able to attest to having experienced “daddy issues” in some way shape of form. Some experiences have left us with deep wounds, scars, disappointment and even in dangerous situations. Some of us may actually have earthly fathers who are very present, positive and involved in our lives, and yet we still sense a deeper longing within us.
I just want to encourage and remind you that no matter which category you fall into, that God desires to step right into the middle of this gap in order to fill it with Himself. You are loved very deeply and unconditionally by your heavenly father and He sees and knows every detail of your life. This is something that I have to remind myself of daily.
Earthly fathers will always fall short because of our proclivity toward sin- even if they have our best interests at heart. God desires that we would make Him our all in all; placing all of our hope , expectations, desires and lives into His hands.
We are not alone. Ever.
I have often had conversations with my earthly father, longing for him to go deeper and really “see” me- His seed! However, I have mourned and grieved when I haven’t experienced this. Our earthly fathers and earthly husbands may not be able to enter into this secret chamber of our hearts, and we must grow to ultimately be okay with this because there IS one that can enter such a sacred space, and that is our heavenly Father, Priest and King Jesus.
He is for us. He fights for us, He desires us, knows our frame and seeks to lead us on each and every day into intimacy with Him. He has placed Himself within us, and the Holy Spirit has shed His love in our hearts and testifies with our spirits that we are children of God.
With God as our Father, we do not need to wonder if we are “known”, or seek to be truly “seen” by a significant other or those around us.
We have His undivided, undiluted attention.
He created every detail in us and knows every pulse and heartbeat. When we cling to Him in this way we can be assured that we will grow in every aspect of our personhood. He fulfills every requirement of an earthly further and more and is the only foundation that is sure, steady and unchangeable.
Whatever your experience has been with your own earthly father, I’d like to leave you with some thoughts and truths that I would encourage you to continually remind yourself of.
O Lord, you have examined my heart
and know everything about me.
You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.
You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand!
I can never escape from your Spirit!
I can never get away from your presence!
If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I go down to the grave, you are there.
If I ride the wings of the morning,
if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
even there your hand will guide me,
and your strength will support me.
I could ask the darkness to hide me
and the light around me to become night—
but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.
To you the night shines as bright as day.
Darkness and light are the same to you.
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.
How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered!
I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up, you are still with me!
May God continue to give us the grace, strength, love, healing and understanding that we need to mature; and the further revelation and acceptance of His fatherhood to us.
Praying for God’s best for you.
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